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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/28472256">nothing changed with how I’ve always felt about you</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/kurojiri/pseuds/kurojiri'>kurojiri</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Amnesia, Baby Tom Riddle, Canonical Character Death, F/M, Light Angst, Pre-Canon, past Merope/Tom Riddle Sr.</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-01-01</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-01-01</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-18 04:09:48</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>1,657</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/28472256</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/kurojiri/pseuds/kurojiri</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Even if his memories had been scrambled that didn’t mean he fully forgot how much he loved Cecilia.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Cecilia/Tom Riddle Sr.</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>2</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>12</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Collections:</b></td><td>RAREHPBINGO</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>nothing changed with how I’ve always felt about you</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Prompt Used: Amnesia ; "Every Night" by Imagine Dragons</p>
<p>“Cause the reason that I'm here<br/>Is the same through all these years<br/>I'm coming home to you”—"Every Night" by Imagine Dragons</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>It had not been his proudest moment. To feel the way his feet were nailed to the ground to have his pride burn the last bridge he thought hadn’t been present to destroy. It had been the last thing he wanted to happen, but it did, and now Tom was sinking to the nearest chair. The wooden legs screeched from the force of his body falling down. He had not been alone, but it was almost like he had the whole room to himself with the way the quiet resumed to control his every thought. The only thing that made him aware of his surroundings had been his Cecilia,  her own hands had grasped at his shoulders, all breath taken too. </p>
<p>He was thankful that his mother was not present. But his father. He had not said anything yet. </p>
<p>More likely getting ready to get the car running. His cane had been ready to pull him up from his own chair, his face had been stone, almost unreadable if not for the unmistakable white gripe of his hands gripping at the handle of his cane. His eyes were deep black and full of anger that didn’t need to be shared with screaming, no that job would come in the form of his mother. When the tea party that she joined a few hours ago would be over her maid would be there ready for her to hear what happened when he had been given a short thin letter from a place he never heard from. </p>
<p>The letter had seen better days and the writing had been subpar from his usual letters from his circle. But the address. The way it had been addressed to him alone had been suspicious and frightening. </p>
<p>He had just got over the months that he spent on  returning to society. Tom could just faintly remember the flat he used to live for a short year, where he had been married to… he didn’t want to think about that. Of the way he had begged Cecilia to give him another chance. Their engagement had been public and then he vanished. He couldn’t say what he did during that time, he only had glimpses of his freedom being taken away from. </p>
<p>It had disgusted him that he had been missing for a while, to then know that he had been tricked to sell his soul when he saw the papers of him being joined so someone that didn’t even look human. The only reason he knew he had been married was because of the little church near the flat he recognized had it in record. But once he had been freed and when he made enough distance from that place he remembered about his family, about Cecilia. </p>
<p>He would always say that he didn’t remember his first marriage. Or  when exactly did he procreate his heir. It wouldn’t be a lie; Tom Riddle Sr. could not recall the first meeting of his first wife or when he married her. But he did receive the record of her name, their wedding date and day of her death. With so little second hand information he could only assume so much about her and their short-lived lives together. </p>
<p>They had no painting of her or taken photos together. (And maybe that had been a blessing in its own way the longer he thought about it.) It would make everything far easier to control the narrative. His family already had to deal with the rumors of his elopement with her, to the day when he came back home with the sudden realization that he had missed a year's worth of memories. His body had ached and with little solutions to help him heal it had been a new pain to see that he almost lost Cecilia for good. Tom's reappearance had helped him with one favor; it caught Cecilia's attention.</p>
<p>She had the fortune of having other suitors that still wanted her as a wife, something that once would have been rare; but nowadays Cecilia's own family fame and history had still pulled for her to gain these favors. </p>
<p>For Tom, however, it had been its own hell when he had been able to clean his appearance after the doctors saw him. It had been hushed then in the beginning. With his body always leaning towards the backyard where he used to remember when Cecilia used to come over to have tea with his mother and ride alongside him afterwards. Those days had once been kinder in his memories. But when he had emerged they had stung. It had taken his whole being to be granted an audience with Cecilia's father, but it had been worth it when it had been Cecilia's maid that managed to get Cecilia into the same room as him. </p>
<p>The reunion had been what let him to his current days, with her holding on him tighter. With him letting himself seek this home that only her soul was able to provide. But when he had received that letter he had wondered if the message could undo everything all over again. </p>
<p>"Father..."</p>
<p>The cane smacked the floor hard making Tom squirm from his chair.  He knew from experience when he was able to talk.</p>
<p>"It is rather unfortunate that this past union has only confirmed our suspicions of what had happened before you came home." His eyes didn't look at his son. But that didn't mean that Tom could fully exhale safely. "However, the Riddle family have always been good Christians, your mother will agree with that much. You will reply to the Matron of that establishment and in it, you will tell her we will receive your son in a weeks time."</p>
<p>"In the meantime we will have to get the nursery room prepared, as well have the will changed. His birth was legal and had been under God's house, however ill-wished and ill-advised. He will be your Heir."</p>
<p>"Yes Father."</p>
<p>He still didn't look pleased. Not with the way he called for an early lunch. </p>
<p>"I will expect you will not mess up your son's future like you nearly did yours." He pulled himself up from his chair and made his way out of the room before looking at Cecilia. "I am sorry Cecilia that this is what you married into. I hope that you won't come to see this as a sign to break your engagement again, my wife and I had always wanted you as a daughter-in-law. And with how my son had... well, I do hope you won't come to regret this decision." </p>
<p>They waited until his father's steps were no longer echoing. Tom had barely moved as his thoughts raced while Cecilia had quietly walked toward the writing desk. A couple of pens had been pulled out and as she started writing on the new envelope Tom watched on how her eyes had been tired. Her own fingers were still able to write the correct address, but he had been sure that she was in the middle of fighting back her own tears. </p>
<p>"Whether it had been longer than a year or not, I would have waited for you."</p>
<p>"Cecilia..."</p>
<p>She shook her head hard. Her grip on the pen looked like it hurt. "I understand what your father and my parents will think about this; but, I just want you to know that nothing has changed since we've met. You have always been the one for me Tom. And even with this new addition to our family it won't stop me from being your wife."</p>
<p>"I was never in love with her."</p>
<p>Her eyes were wet now, and as she bit her lips Tom couldn't help but think that even when she was distressed she still managed to look refined. </p>
<p>"Still, I can't help but wonder what happened while you were gone. Or what would I do if he looks anything but like you. I always wanted to be your wife and have a family, but with your memories being the way they are and with how you have this restlessness fits few doctors can fully explain, I wonder how long we will have to fight to be happy."</p>
<p>With the sun still plastered up high in the sky it made his fiancé shine brighter. He took in that view silently for ten seconds. Watching the way her shoulders struggled to remain stone. Then he too got up from his chair with more care. It wouldn't do good for his body to go into a fit. And as he walked closer to her, Cecilia sank into his arms wordlessly.  </p>
<p>"I don't really know how long either love, but I do know that so long as we both love each other I don't  think we have to worry about regretting our marriage. As for my progeny, I have no doubts that he will be very happy to have you as a mother."</p>
<p>"If he's anything like you, it won't be hard to love him."</p>
<p>As he hummed in agreement he thought back to the letter that would be needed to be finished before his father's lunch was over. The help would have already started cleaning up the nursery by the time he and Cecilia would go inspect the room. But before they could do any renovations he knew that after his mother was past her mood she would like to use that excuse as a means to have a new task to work alongside with Cecilia. A nanny would have to be hired as well before the new addition would be brought over. </p>
<p>The Riddle Manor was about to get louder and whether he was ready or not he accepted the fact that he would make sure that Merope Riddle née Gaunt would remain a speck in his life; and that his son would never have to deal with this part of their history for all their sakes. </p>
<p> </p>
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